TPE

Total Power Exchange (TPE)

Misconceptions or Misunderstanding?

The term TPE (Total Power Exchange) can be seen to some as an extreme

form of 24/7 D/s relationship. The concept of TPE can be quite frightening

to a lot of people so they may prefer to choose the term EPE (Erotic Power

Exchange).

A definition of TPE from the book 'Screw The Roses Give Me The Thorns'

"TPE is the empowerment of the Dominant BY the submissive to his/her

control. The power exchange is consensual and should be well negotiated.

The depth of power yielded by the submissive is equal to the level of

responsibility assumed by the Dominant."

TPE is a subject that i have discussed at great length with my Master

and fortunately W/we both have the same opinions on this. I must stress

to the readers that what Y/you will read is my opinion, how i see TPE

and is in no way saying that anyone is wrong! However, i do feel

that there is a misconception or at least a misunderstanding about TPE

and do think that a different light should be put on it!

Lets start with defining a D/s relationship. It is a relationship where

the submissive has a voice, she/he sets the limits, has a safe word and

subservience is for an allotted period of time....it is not 24/7!!

A submissive submits to a certain point, always holds back, he/she

does as they are told until something reaches their limits and then they

stop being submissive. A submissive is still his/her own person. It doesn't

matter what way round one explains a submissive, it always comes back

to the submissive being in control. i.e. Topping from the bottom!

In my opening sentence i have put that TPE can be seen as an extreme

form of 24/7 D/s relationship. This information i have gleaned from

many many sites and in my opinion it is in error.

Total Power Exchange (TPE) does not happen with D/s, at best Y/you get

Erotic Power Exchange (EPE) or as i like to phrase it Partial Power Exchange

(PPE).

Lets take a look at D/s...when a Dominant and submissive get together

the Dom/me should really give the sub a checklist to find out what

he/she has done, will/won't do, likes/dislikes, will try or won't try. Limits

are discussed, 'smile'...how many times have i heard people say they

don't have limits then cutting, scat, watersports etc are mentioned and eyes

open wide, eyebrows raise in horror and suddenly they realise they do have

limits. Limits are not just for the submissive, the Dominant has limits

too and both parties must respect the limits that each have.

In a D/s relationship play is always negotiated and it is always the

submissive who is in control. A submissive will only ever give Partial

Power Exchange as play is only for an allotted time...it is not 24/7!

A Dom/me/sub may not necessarily live together, so may only come

together for parties, clubs or as and when their 'vanilla' lives allow it.

On the whole a submissive is a toy as and when they can get together -

if the parties are living together married or not, then their play is usually

confined to the bedroom as their 'vanilla' life is their lifestyle,

this can neither be interpreted as 24/7 or Total Power Exchange (TPE).

From my own experience D/s is sexually orientated and there is

nothing wrong with this at all, but there are some of U/us who find the

sexual aspect to be the last thing on O/our minds and more often that

not Y/you will find this within the Master/slave relationship which is very

different to D/s.

Let me define a Master/slave relationship...a Master/slave relationship

is where the slave has no voice, has no limits (only those of his/her Owner) has no safe word,

subservience is at all times, gives his/her all, this is 24/7 Total Power

Exchange! If the relationship does not have the above elements then it is not

M/s, it is D/s with Partial Power Exchange or Erotic Power Exchange.

A slave does not submit to his/her Master/Mistress, a slave consents to surrender

his/her freedom, total control of his/her life lies solely with the Master/Mistress.

Majority of slaves have been submissives at some stage or other and the move into

slavery can be deliberate, subtle or without even knowing they have taken that

final step. A 'true' slave, in other words a 'born' slave is very rare but there are

one or two around. Submissives that choose to go into slavery have to be trained

depending on what type of slave the Master/Mistress requires. There are four basic

types of slaves, Gorean, Musson (Islamic), Chaldean (Greco Romano), and white

slave - French (sex slave). In the main the first three types are servile and sex is

not an integral part of his/her slavery although it does play a small part within slavery.

A white slave - French (sex slave) is exactly that, some servile duties are performed,

but this type of slave is a sexual toy not only to his/her Owner but is always

available to other Master/Mistress's as well.

Most slaves i have come across are in total servitude in every aspect of their lives.

A slave in general is a slave by choice, he/she loves deeply and fully because it is

a part of him/her. The essence of a slave is devotion, nothing less is worthy of him/her

and nothing less is acceptable to his/her Owner. He/she is obedient in everything

and strives to always be pleasing to his/her Owner. The slave not only hands

over their mind, body, and soul but everything they own, the slave themselves

become property and hands over total control of their lives to their Owners.

The Master/Mistress must be in no doubt of their responsibilities when taking a slave,

the one thing that has to be realised is that a slave is for life...if the Master/Mistress

cannot commit for life then they must not take a slave!

A Master/Mistress is responsible for the slave's well being in every aspect from the moment

the slave wakes to the moment the slave goes to sleep - this is 24/7 Total Power Exchange!

In conclusion a Dom/sub relationship is a fantasy played out, either in the privacy

of their homes or in public at clubs and parties. But that is all it is a fantasy - a Dom/me

will not or does not want full responsibility of another human being and a submissive

will not /does not want to hand over total control of their lives to a Dom/me.

On the other hand a Master/Mistress will take full responsibility for their slave and the

slave surrenders all to their Owners which is what a Master/Mistress becomes

when they have a slave.

So...in retrospect the definition of TPE from the book "Screw The Roses

Give Me The Thorns" should read 'PPE or EPE is the empowerment of the Dominant

BY the submissive to his/her control. The power exchange is consensual etc etc'.

In both cases Safety, Sanity and Consensuality must be adhered to, but they are

slightly different from each other. In D/s Safe, Sane and Consensual is practiced

at every play session, the submissive always has the power of veto...in other words a

safe word to stop play if he/she feels it is going to far or limits have been reached.

In M/s Safe, Sane and Consensual is practiced but in a slightly different manner.

During the time they get to know each other the potential slave also fills out a check list

of likes/dislikes etc and limits are made clear by both parties. Once it has

been agreed that the Master/Mistress will take the slave then it is at this stage

that is different from D/s. The slave gives his/her consent to surrender all once and once only

in his/her life assuming that the Master/Mistress do not have an early demise. The slave

also is made to understand at this point that once surrender is accepted his/her power

of veto is removed completely. The other thing to remember is that a slave

cannot ask for release, the Owner is the one who can release the slave if He/She wishes

to but then circumstances must be dire for that to happen...it is not a normal

occurrence!

In both cases if Safe, Sane and Consensual have not been met then it is ABUSE.

My advice is get out of the relationship, if you are in fear then ask for help, those in the

community will always help in this situation. Abuse of women must not be tolerated,

i.e. brushed under the carpet, just because you are a sub or slave does not give anyone

the right to physically or mentally abuse you...it is not an excuse!! This applies to males as well!

To all Dom/mes and Masters/Mistress's, take care of Your sub/slave and cherish the gift

they have given You.

To all subs and slaves, take care of Your Dom/mes and Masters/Mistress's, be the best

you can be, there is no greater gift that you can bestow upon your Dom/me or

Master/Mistress than that of your submission or surrender!

September 2004